Remind Me Again, Why Is He Mr. Wrong?

18 Feb
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Image by lyimuse via Flickr

It turns out that my heart has a will of its own that refuses to be subdued.

Last week after talking to one of my girlfriends, I ran out of patience with her refusal to let go of a dead-end relationship. Then I turned around and looked in a mirror and what did I see but her. Reflected back at me was a woman who refused to let go of a relationship that was destined to go nowhere. So I declared and decreed that my heart would unshackle itself from this man and move on! But my heart, sneakily, has continued to hope in him. And it says, “Remind me again why he’s Mr. Wrong?” So I do.

I say: “He’s not suitable because he has no money.”
My heart says: “Ahh, true, true. But what a coincidence that as you prayed that God would give him an income he tells you that he’s going on salary at his church; that they’re matching the salary he had at his last job. Nevertheless, you could be right in thinking that since he has no money now he’ll never have any money. Could be. Maybe.”

I say: “Also, he’s commitmentphobic. He’s not able to commit.”
My heart says: “Yes, that’s right. I remember that about him. Yet I notice that when you have crossed little emotional bridges towards him these days, and think to yourself that THIS bridge-crossing will surely trigger his instinct to run, he hasn’t run. He’s still here. And hasn’t he served his pastor for the past 15 years, even through dire circumstances. He seems committed.”

I say: “Don’t forget that he only has a H.S. diploma, and doesn’t seem to want anything more.”
My heart says: “Isn’t that the sad truth. No degrees. But…I wonder what he would say if you asked him about his plans to go back to Bible school. And I wonder, too, how many men that you’ve come across, with or without degrees, who pray God’s heart for you? (I don’t remember WB, for instance, ever really praying for you. Of course I’m probably mistaken. You would know better.) And I wonder how many men, with or without degrees, would take long moments to speak uplifting words to your discouraged soul, words based not on their love or like, but always grounded in faith in what God has said to and about you. I wonder how many men have the degree of heart that he has.”

I say: “But he’s Pentecostal! And his clothes are too fashionable. I’ve never seen him in a basic charcoal suit for goodness’ sake.”

My heart says: “He’s a friend, a confidante, and a mentor to both men and women, to those both senior and junior to him. He’s faithful. He’s attractive—even in his knee length sport coat.”

My heart makes compelling arguments.

So I’m praying.

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2 Responses to “Remind Me Again, Why Is He Mr. Wrong?”

  1. HarleyQ March 12, 2010 at 12:14 am #

    I just happened on your site. Interesting how most single christian women seem to have the same lament “why am I still single.” I believe that most single women want to move on to another phase of their lives and but there are not a lot of good options available. Hang in there

  2. AnonymousGirl January 21, 2013 at 11:59 pm #

    I can so relate to this post … I have done the same types of inner dialogues many times. I love your writing and your blog; I hope you keep doing it! Although I also hope you find Mr. Right soon and thus have less reason to post on this topic, too. 🙂

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