Is it Harder for Successful Women to Date?

28 May
Dry earth in the Sonora desert, Mexico.
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Is it harder for successful women to date? The article,  Dating Woes of Successful Women , says: probably.

I realized recently that I have not been on a date in months–all year in fact.  (Gasp).  Seeing as how it’s practically June, I concluded that it was high time I did something about this sad state of affairs.  Thus, over Memorial Day weekend, when a free trial was available, I joined eharmony.   I’ll let you know if this foray into cyberspace results in any actual dates…

In any case, I’m raising my antennea and making myself receptive to any signals that are sent my way from eligible bachelors.   Would love to know if others are in a dating drought (like me) or in a rainstorm of socialbility or somewhere in between.  Something tells me that I’m not alone and that drought has swept over the land.

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2 Responses to “Is it Harder for Successful Women to Date?”

  1. Ken June 23, 2009 at 10:37 am #

    Yes, it is harder for successful women to date for various reasons, including, but not limited to:

    1. Time. Career success requires a lot of time (sometimes a lot of education, too… which also takes time.)

    2. A reduction in acceptable prospects. Women tend to marry men who earn more than they do. The more you earn, the fewer men there are in that category.

    3. Personality/behavior. If a woman is used to being assertive, demanding, and bossy all day at the office, she may have trouble turning that off in her personal life, and most men a successful woman would want to marry don’t want to put up with that.

    4. What is the advantage? Men appreciate women who won’t be bringing debt (except for a mortgage or reasonable car payment) to the marriage. Other than that, a woman’s career success matters little to potential mates. While the first thing your girlfriends may ask about a new guy in your life is “What does he do?” (subtext: does he make enough money?) – guys do not ask each other that question about a guy’s new gal. The guy with the new gal will volunteer the info if it implies physical attractiveness or is considered a “sexy” profession: “She’s a model” or “She’s a nurse”.

    The upside is that you can presumably take care of yourself financially, and thus if you choose man, it will be solely based on if he is right for you or not, instead of a need for financial security.

    • CC December 14, 2010 at 11:13 am #


      One quibble:

      #2 is accurate, but it’s also evidence of a pervasive elitism amongst women. They’re shopping for a Trophy Man. Women have simply raised the bar for what they consider to be an “acceptable” man. There are just as many “good men” today as 40 years ago. But women are now the majority of college grads — in part because college is unappealing to men because it’s acceptable to be openly hostile towards masculinity due to the massive evidence of radical feminism in the humanities. In my experience, women’s expectations have *narrowed*. It’s not simply enough for a man to have a good, steady job. He’s got to be a doctor/lawyer/architect AND he’s got to be tall AND he’s got to be suave AND he’s got to be gorgeous AND he’s got to be hilarious. Women’s expectations are seemingly shaped by TV dramas.

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